The last day of Ramadhan..and tomorrow we will celebrate Aidilfitri.
Ramadhan will leave us..and by permission of Allah, we will meet again next year.
Today, I've sent a text message to a person whom I admire, respect and to some extend..well..err..I can't say it.. (dem!) It's a confession Im struggling with since early 2009, after the operation. The lovely, comfy, warm feelings that I have for a stranger who chased me along Jalan Ampang during loomy, dark February midnite. And how frighten I am, pushing the pedal to the limit..gunning my car, trying to escape..but foolishly stop right near my house.
How that very moment had change me, and him. We had shared loadsa things..but 1 thing that we never ever shares was..our feelings - towards each other. And the phrase "go with the flow" is just lame..an excuse for a person who can't make decision, who is too afraid to lose, who wouldn't want to ruin the sweet moment with hurting-truth. Hence, who can deny this feeling that I have, for I know he might has it too.
Future is uncertain..that is so true. Who would know what life has to offer us in the future. Future is a gamble and a set of probability we can forecast, mitigate the risks that may occur; then work towards it with no guarantee that we can win. But today, is certain..thus, we need to make decision for now, for present moment, for happiness. I am afraid of future and would he be there; for the moment (and I hope for long) to sail the life's adventure together, make mistakes together. Does he wants to be with me or not?
I will miss his writings..those writings that used to make me stop at newspaper stand every morning on my way to work.
I will miss his voice as a commentator (there, I said it right, finally!).
I will miss his passion, his humbleness.
I will miss his ignorance.
I will miss him.
Goodbye Ramadhan.
Goodbye YOU.
Ramadhan will leave us..and by permission of Allah, we will meet again next year.
Today, I've sent a text message to a person whom I admire, respect and to some extend..well..err..I can't say it.. (dem!) It's a confession Im struggling with since early 2009, after the operation. The lovely, comfy, warm feelings that I have for a stranger who chased me along Jalan Ampang during loomy, dark February midnite. And how frighten I am, pushing the pedal to the limit..gunning my car, trying to escape..but foolishly stop right near my house.
How that very moment had change me, and him. We had shared loadsa things..but 1 thing that we never ever shares was..our feelings - towards each other. And the phrase "go with the flow" is just lame..an excuse for a person who can't make decision, who is too afraid to lose, who wouldn't want to ruin the sweet moment with hurting-truth. Hence, who can deny this feeling that I have, for I know he might has it too.
Future is uncertain..that is so true. Who would know what life has to offer us in the future. Future is a gamble and a set of probability we can forecast, mitigate the risks that may occur; then work towards it with no guarantee that we can win. But today, is certain..thus, we need to make decision for now, for present moment, for happiness. I am afraid of future and would he be there; for the moment (and I hope for long) to sail the life's adventure together, make mistakes together. Does he wants to be with me or not?
I will miss his writings..those writings that used to make me stop at newspaper stand every morning on my way to work.
I will miss his voice as a commentator (there, I said it right, finally!).
I will miss his passion, his humbleness.
I will miss his ignorance.
I will miss him.
Goodbye Ramadhan.
Goodbye YOU.
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